Christmas thought

My mom and my sis are with me for more than 16 days now. They were
supposed to leave this morning, but because of my own selfishness to
have them with me one more minute, and of my own carelessness in
budgeting the time for check in, they missed the cue.

God must had answered my prayers! It was really sad to send them off
this morning. And now, I have them with me for Christmas!(Poor boy, my
brother would need to stay alone for Christmas...) The next earliest
flight to home is on Dec26. And praise the Lord, we got a special rate
in the peak season!

This morning, as my sis sms me from Macau Airport, informing me that
they had missed the cue, it was very messy. I didn't have friends in
Macau, and I didn't know how to help. At that moment, I found it hard
to be still.

Good will come to him who is generous and lends freely,
who conducts his affairs with justice.
Surely he will never be shaken;
a righteous man will be remembered forever
He will have no fear of bad news;
his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD.
His heart is secure, he will have no fear;
in the end he will look in triumph on his foes.
Psalm112:5-8

I prayed, and tried to concentrate to hear His voice and instruction,
for an answer of the situation, and direction on what to do next, but
I was too busy to listen. Contradicting, isn't it? My heart was
secure, but I just could not stand still.

On the way to Macau, I was full with wild thoughts, making all the
possible assumptions, trying to figure out a reason why would this
happen? How could I made such a silly mistake, and cause them into
such troubles? Then, I found myself using all those testimonies that
were once told to figure out a scene, that God had actually permit
this to prevent us from harm. Then, I convinced myself, there must be
someone in the airport that was so lost, and because of the miss, my
mom was preaching to them. Then, I imagine God will send His angel to
give generously to my family. Or maybe the air asia officer felt
sorry that they will change them to the next time without extra
charges! So many thoughts......

There were a serial of challenges and sad moments blending together
with the excitement of Heart4Japan within weeks just recently. My
church is calling me back because they thought it was too harsh for me
to be alone in Hong Kong, the finance needs, the workload of the
course, the unpromising plan to Japan as a public health expert. No
part time job available for about two months now. My landlord had
reduced the rent for me, but because it is difficult to find a nice
flatmate I might need to move to smaller place. In all these decisions
to make, I really need to be very still and listen to Him. "My sheep
recognize my voice." Jesus is my Shepherd! I need to learn to listen
regardless how busy and how noisy the surrounding is.

But then, the ministry was exciting! The pleasant of walking with the
Lord, telling people about Christ, witnessing Christ were amazing! I
am reaching out to some friends, please pray for a several friends of
mine: Bonnie, Nichole, Issa, Silent. Pray that God will work in them.
I found it hard with HM, She must had been hurt badly while she
attended church few years back. She will just shun away from anything
that is related to church. And she had only me as her friend. It is
very hard for me too not to talk about Jesus when I relate situations
to situations.

There are 2 places in Hong Kong now, started to pray for Japan in
group. I'm exploring more. God had given me opportunities to share
with a few churches on my vision about Japan. I believe that God will
raise some of these people to start praying for Japan! A church in
Shenzhen had started to incorporate Japan into their prayer agenda in
their regular prayer meetings. So, it made the numbers to three.
AMAZING! God is good!

I'm taking Hong Kong University and my dissertation in Public Health
as a means to Japan universities is not a secret in my faculty. My
supervisor knows about it, and it frees me from pretending. We have no
confidence on how this could be, but we'll work on it! It's a
challenge! A good one.

There are few things I'm for sure:
1. Even if at the finish of the course, I would not make it to Japan
with my research on Hikikomori or suicide, a well designed and written
dissertation will certainly help the workers on the field to tackle
the question. It would be able to link different experts together to
work towards youth issues. It will also contributes to research.
2. When I started Heart4Japan, it was never about me going to Japan.
It is about getting people to see Japan as a mission field, and get
people have interest in it, to pray, to go.
3. I cannot compare my life here with our field masters in Japan,
there are having much tougher time, much lesser time to sleep than me.
4. God is faithful! Things fall into His plan without us knowing it,
and He is always in control.
5. I had came to Hong Kong by faith, living in His providence even
when my faith was small. These are not only about His mercy on me.
Somehow I sense that this is His will to put me into the subject of
public health. Hong long more I would be able to stay, I have no
clues. If I need to move my tent, I'll move.
6. My Father is moving people for Japan, He is turning hearts of young
and old towards His Kingdom in Japan! "The Church will come in!" This
was His promise.

Merry Christmas! Everybody!

Praise God Again and Again!

Praise God again and again!

(i) My apartment is alright now. The reason for the flood had been
made clear. The culprits were a shaver and a shoe brush. I have very
clean floor now. Kenneth and his family helped me to clean up the
apartment. And now it is brand new :-) I would need to do some tidy up
tomorrow, things are great! I didn't lost anything. Praise Jesus!

(ii) I finally finished my assignment before time. And I did a great
job in the tutorial discussion this evening, working together with my
dear classmates. Again, I learned that I need to grasp on principles
and have crisp sense of analysing if I wished to make a solid
argument.

(iii) My school fees was able to deferred, but deal to some technical
mistakes, I was automatically deregistered by the school. I was also
asked to bare the cost of surcharge. Though my library card was
expired, but somehow I am still able to access to the school Web to do
my program. God is certainly working, isn't He? I had wrote a letter
to the Overseas Student Administration Department to appeal for
surcharged waived. I wrote about my disappointment in the notifying
system of the school as well as the poor hospitality. I thought I was
being bold. Pray that I don't run ahead God in this :-) But I do have
peace in voicing out my dissatisfaction about the school system. I
hope that they don't take it personally.

(iv) I found many people who had been a blessing to me, and I also
found myself as a blessing to others! :-) I pray that these people
would be drawn to God.

4 Items to thanks God with! Praise Jesus, He's alive!

I want to give thanks to the Lord! For He had been my helper!

1. The University of Hong Kong had stopped my library card (student card) due to unpaid school fees on last Friday.
Reasons: Unknown.
Story: EPF had not released my education funds due to two missing documents. I was surprised as I was informed by the finance department last month. I went to apply for defer payment, and by the help of the Lord, I was able to gain a grace period till end of December.
Excitements:
(i) Without paying, the university accepted me as a student.
(ii) Without paying, I am actually a student, and coming to the end of the semester.
(iii) When my student card was stopped, there was a librarian who helped me to extend it till Monday, so that I could seek help from the Oversea Student Administration (OSA) Department.

I had tried to call the OSA today, but no one attained to me.

2. I was nearly injured today, but God had preserved me!
Reason: The big round mirror in the bus fell on my laps while I was heading to Heart4Japan prayer meeting this afternoon (Monday). There was a big square metal attached to it, 10 inches X 12 inches, the diameter of the mirror was about 12 inches. The driver heard the great noise (I was in the upper deck, first row) that he was so worried, he stopped the bus by the road side and came up to inspect. His action surprised me more than the dropped mirror.
Excitements:
(i) The mirror could had fell on my head.
(ii) The mirror could had fell on the floor, and the broken glass would injured me.
(iii) I was not hurt at all.
(iv) Blessed is the one who is persecuted because of Christ! :-)

I was suffered from some spiritual attack at about 10am in the morning, the Lord had reminded me to kneel down before Him to pray.


3. My flat was flooded at about 10pm, and I had someone to receive me to his home for overnight.
Reason: Unknown.
Story: I contacted Kenneth, my landlord's son. He came and help. Many came and help, but all in vain. The house ended up with more water. Praise God that Jesus is in control. I pray that we would witness a miracle in the morning! I pray that God will preserve my rooms! I pray that God will help me to clean up the whole apartment!

Four sisters are coming to visit me on Friday. They need place to stay.

Excitements:
(i) I was in peace, and I believe that leaves a good testimony. The president of the block told me most people yelled at him.
(ii) I had people to be with me while I tried to clean it up.
(iii) I had Kenneth to take me in to his place so that I can continue to do my assignments.
(iv) I had place to go when the smell is bad.
(v) Kenneth agreed to help me to clean the house.

The first incident was the burnt mark on my bed sheet due to the "flying cigarettes". The Lord had taken care of that. The second was the mysterious leaking in the kitchen, 5 days before Mag and Esther came over to stay. Now, the flood, 4 days before another sisters come.

Good, blessed is the one who is persecuted!

4. My friend sent me a copy of assignment so that I could have some rest.
Reason: I was not able to do my assignment because of the long weekend conference. And because my student card was not active, I cannot access the school web and do my assignments. And now because of the flood, I lost time.

Excitements:
(i) I have caring friends.
(ii) I have loving friends.
(iii) God is certainly watching!

I need to finish my assignment now! I am chairing this evening. I need to come out with presentation files, and structured plans for the tutorial discussions tonight! My life is exciting! I had many good encouragements from the Lord, and if the devil is trying to defeat me by all these, he is nothing but a looser! Your prayers will uphold me! The Lord is my helper, whom should I afraid!

Japan is coming to life!!!

Another Prayer Group Praying For Japan

Praise Jesus, I found a church that is earnestly praying for Japan in
Hong Kong. Hallelujah! I went to the prayer meeting this evening, it
was amazing!

These people, they are Chinese, they pray for Japan because the church
has a vision for Japan. They love the church, and they love God,
although they don't understand why, no facts, no reason except for
knowing it is the desire of God to see Japan saved. And after praying
for many months, now they have a Japanese pastor, talently gifted,
charismatic and spiritual, joined them 2 months back, and started to
lead the team.

There are people praying for Japan. Japanese and non-Japanese. I found
Mayumi Sensei with her J-Chapel, I found Rev. Joseph Ozawa who has
this hippopotamus ministry,and now I found Kazawa Sensei. And of
course, us! Heart4Japan prayer warriors! In fact, all of us are
Heart4Japan warriors!

God reminded me one thing today, there is no founder for Heart4Japan.
He is the founder! The ministry is not about people, but His heart,
His desire! Any one, who is on the field, who pray for Japan, that is
because a heart for Japan! I pray that God will join all of us
together in short, and we will together see a BREAKTHROUGH in Japan!

The power of PRAYERS brings forth forgiveness, reconciliation, Salvation!

There is a promise for Japanese, we are obligated to help them to get
there when we had crossed Jordan, because we are FAMILY!


I heard some people cried out to God, "Many people are praying for
Japan, so Japan will have Jesus!" Japan will have Jesus! But I hear
the field crying, "we need more workers, we need more warriors!" May
God bless you!

It must have been your unfailing prayers!

Thanks for your unfailing prayers! I believe it is your constant prayers that uphold me in the time when I nearly fall. Allow me to share with you a couple of prayer request:

I'm Adopted
Praise God! I remember He was telling me that the church is coming in. "The Church is coming in," He said. True enough, I recently heard that the Chinese Church in FGA had agreed to adopt me as their adopted missionary. This is a big move for them! It had not been easy to make that decision, it takes a long commitment in terms to pray for me and to fight alongside with me. And God's grace to me, this is like gaining approval from the leaders and the elders of the church on my move, I'm not alone.

Please Pray For:
1. Pray that the Lord will bless the church and move more people to the mission field. Stir up more hearts and souls that will burn for Christ!
2. Pray that the congregation begin to learn to support their missionaries by organizing praying, giving, welcoming and motivating on their own!
3. Pray that the cell groups will come together and seek God's direction in their lives!
4. Pray that at least 2 home cells will adopt me and Japan as their unreached nation.

Torch
I find that my passions in Christ is lighting up many others, but it is still weak to set up a fire. I wish that I'm a torch! Japan is not alone in this fight. There are many more counties that need Christ, many more lives that needs His intervention. Tibet, Mongol, Nepal, Asia and many more. To God, I don't think the number counts ( Although I had always made used the number of Japanese as the biggest unreached in the world). But, really I don't think it is the number of people that He is looking at. But then, what is it?

5. Pray for me wisdom and courageous to continue to move on to seek God in His presence!
6. Pray that God will raise up more warriors for Heart4Japan, and join us together, so that we will be able to partner and learn from each other.
7. Pray that God will raise someone who is gifted in reading and analyzing materials to help in the interpretation of materials. Someone who is willing to seek God for answers.

Challenge of turning false hopes into HOPE
I see many false hopes that were installed in people, and all these false hopes had sustained their dreams and strength to live on for generations in a land that had not heard of Gospel. It is a battle to turn these hopes into real HOPE. I wish to learn from these workers who are in the field, working on with love and kindness and cares and concerns. I believe it is life that impacts life! It is how we live and how we are as a salt and light that turn people to Christ. But then, is that all?

8. Pray for me chances to learn from people, and chances to be on the battle field, to have a taste on what it is.
9. Pray for me strength in discipleship.

Holy Spirit
Some people said that we need Holy Spirit, and in some hard ground, there are great evil forces, and the move of the Holy Spirit had been bound.

I felt a struggle of spirits in Japan, and there was the place that I was convinced that I had to start with prayers, strong prayers and intercessions! Prayer was lacking in Japan. I have no problems with that. But my question is, "Can the evil spirit bound the Holy Spirit?" I don't think that is biblical right!

10. Pray that I will only listen to God and only to Him alone. Not my voice, not others. John10

Fine-tune our hearts
I felt that the reason that God wants us to pray for His work in Japan, it was because He wanted us to be serious in His Kingdom. There was no meaning when we sent a troop to a land just because we needed to fulfill the quota, or we knew that was the right thing to do. The hearts and attitudes were the ones that needed to be fixed before His Kingdom could come! What I felt deeply was that, we, the people of God had not moved together with the Spirit of God, and that's why we were struggling! Unknowingly, we were in the ways of God's plan! And God knew that!

He had put us there. He had called His people to Japan, whether we served willingly or in hesitate. And He so loved us, that He was shaping us to be in-tune with him and witness His wonders and saving grace in Japan! But first, we must be in-tune with Him!

What would make us in tune? That is something that we are seeking.


Addition: Dr. Joseph Ozawa had came out with a good material for Children in Japanese. Please pray for the Hippopotamus ministry and that God will maximize the influence and effectiveness of the materials.

So many...... So huge a field!

Somehow, I'm amazed. Do you know how many out there need God in their lives? How many need an intervention by the Holy Spirit and His holy hand?

Does a huge number counts?

What is God crying out to us?

How much had we seen? How much had we heard? The blind, the deaf, the mental illness. Mongol, Tibet, Afghan, India, China, Japan, Nepal, Europe, Africa, America, the mountains, the valleys, the rivers, how many more had not heard of Gospel? A friend told me, he would never think of Europe when he thinks about missions. He said, they have plenty of opportunities to hear Christ, when others have none. Yes, Indonesia, Brunei, Asia, Russia, North Korea, many more!

In all these cries, I know only one thing. The field needs workers, the harvest needs workers! So many...... so huge a field! Are we catching hold of His word?

Do not mislead

In communication of Gospel, we are not to construct our own understanding about Jesus Christ. Once we do that, the message lost its power and the Kingdom suffer souls lost.

In communication of work, we are not to mislead people with misinterpretation of facts and data. It cost dignity, justice, trust and worthiness when we are caught in misleading people by distorted facts or lies.


When blind leads blind, both falls into the pit. Matthew 15:14


Rebel begins with distrust.

My tears are drying, Lord.
My heart is burnt with desires!
There are so many things to do,
Yet I do not know where to begin.

I cry out my soul to you, Lord.
I need your very guidance,
To walk carefully in your way,
Not to slumber nor sleep,
Before your Kingdom come.

I made your dreams my dreams,
Your desires as my desires.
How I wish I can pursue your will
Full heartedly.
I'm ashame with what I'm lack of,
But I know I'll be make perfect in you!

The Rock, my Salvation, my Refuge,
Jesus Christ!
You are my all and all!

无题

渐渐换季了。气候时冷时热，有点闷闷的感觉。但是天气好起来的时候还是蛮舒爽的。绵绵的细雨里在校园里漫步倒是挺浪漫的。只是我可能已经过了这种浪漫的年龄吧，还是目前的忙碌使人提不起这个心情来？

It is God who armed me with strength and makes my way perfect

The more busy I am, the more I should cling on to the Lord, and be still before Him. Trusting him will make my way. For it is His way, and I merely a walking vessel. A vessel has no direction of its own. But the master that control the vessel yes. It is the direction that the master set, where a vessel is heading to.

I found myself hardly have time for anything except for the studies in the course. I found it hard for even spending 2 hours in transport. Then, unsatisfy, I asked myself. What I am here for? Course work? Of course. But then, how about bible study? how about fellowship? how about discipling? how about Heart4Japan?

I began to see my limitation in organizing my time. Finally I decided to set everything aside. I began to make time for bible study and discipleship with my prayer group, regardless I had finished my text reading, or my assignment. And of course, I found that I gained but not loose! Again, it proved that the more time that I spend in ministry, in praying with others, the more time I gain.

The point that I want to make is that, I was able to have a clearer understanding about my study and I have more time to spend because it was used efficiently.

May this bless you too!

God is soverign God!

无题

天星码头被拆毁了，很多人带着一股依恋到码头绑上一条一条的蓝丝带。新的码头取代了历史，但是却提供了更多的商业契机。

而我，倒不在乎是新旧码头，只要我能够依旧乘渡轮穿梭于繁忙的都市之中，我就已经觉得很写意了。当然，这跟我只属于这个地方的过客有关。没有历史的牵连，幸福变成了很简单。但对那些去系上蓝丝带的市民，我猜被拆毁的该是他们的回忆吧？

在吉隆坡的上空，我们时而会看见盘旋的鹰。在香港城市的上空，常常有“哇！哇！”的一声响，划破长空。它们也不是成群结队的飞，有点像鹰，有时候孤单，有时候两三个凑合着在空中戏耍。

然后，又时候从码头向城市走去，你会看见在一些建筑物的平顶上，有着螺旋桨向上转、上升，再往对岸飞去。好像在戏里头，有很重要的人物有着很重要的事要办，持着很重要的文件，在思绪里弥漫着一股很神秘的气息。

近年来香港的空气污染指数在国际污染地位排行榜上渐渐有名。基本上，从九龙眺望维多利亚港已经逐渐迈向雾里看花的地步。很多时候，望向东涌的方向，你会看见一朵黑色又或者深褐色的云朵在它的上空停留着，很独特。但是游客的热情依然不减，携老带少地在港湾留恋、拍照。每天晚上的“幻彩咏香江”这个节目依然在进行。维多利亚港不愧是世界上著名的旅游点。纵然可见度朦胧一片，依然不减魅力。大家不禁因为具体生活素质的提高而沉醉在自己所编织的幻象里，你可以说他们缺乏危机感，也可以说他们为经济鹏飞说付出的代价执迷不悟。

但，我不过是一个过客。我只对色彩和独特的建筑设计有兴趣。最主要的是漫步在港湾，让我暂时远离嚣张的城市的味道。仅此而已。于是我腾出了时间，可以学习看人世间的浮华和不真实。

Perceptions affects our behavior and most often results in wrong judgments

Learning about my naiveness, I found that I had wronged my late-aunty many times with poor judgment based on my perceived "sound knowledge" about her condition in health and mental being. The "sound knowledge" is base on personal experience, the professionalism in certain area. And so often, I was misled by biases, and perceptions. We need to learn that there is no absolute truth except Jesus Christ. The verse in James 4 turns into a stronger light, and God is leading me to enter another dimention to show me my inequity. I thank God for my aunty's salvation, and I believe that she is now healthy and loved in heaven. The sorrows turned into joy, the bitterness of being wrong (In fact, she had never shown bitterness towards my wrong perceptions towards her). It was love that supported her all the while to love me. And I based on my own perception, took her love in my own view without giving full consideration towards her.

It seems justifiable because "we need to think of ourselves". There is always a benchmark of "You had tried your best!", "You done enough!" My late-aunty and I had good relationship, we loved each other and that could be witnessed. Yet, I cannot tell lies. I had certainly wronged her in many ways, many times. With my perceived observation. And these perceived observation and judgment sounded so "valid". The validity could never be 100%, now I learn that even you are quite 99% sure about a hypothesis, you will still have 1% of chance of being wrong. In statistic, the higher the confidence level, the less precise you are!

Doctor could always be wrong in their diagnosis, and healing is often in God's hand even you go through extensive treatments! And life or death, troubles or confidence would not be always be equal to our beliefs nor our faith in God. We should know this by our hearts now, but yet in ministry we always overlook. It is like when we are in deliverance service, a person who is full of tears, we tend to take him or her as confessing or being acknowledge of evil past. Not likely, that could be tears of joy. When someone hold his or her fist tight, it could be a spiritual warfare, it could also be a dedication to strive for the Lord!

I think that is why God wants me to study public health before I enter Japan. He is giving me a new light in the scripture, and challenging me to learn that I had not gave all that I had eventhough I thought so.

Our behavior is a reflection of what we perceive. It is perspective that induce judgment. We can make many repeated mistakes, when we face problems on the field. I.e. Japan. We made judgment before we knew it, beware! Our perspective and biases could be so "biblical" in our eyes. My heart! Rejoice in God, keep Trust! Be guided and guarded by the Holy Spirit!

Lord, help me! I don't want to make such mistakes, because I feel the pain in wronging others, and apologies could be too hard in times. Help me to see through you, and speak through you. For my tongue is uncontrolled, and it speaks evil without me being able to catch it. Ignorance would be the major cause of this. Lord, give me the wisdom and love to love you and to obey you in truth and joy and peace!

Reality of Christ? or the presentation of Christ?

I disagree with Douglos in her opinion of risk in many areas, but I love some of her phrases that she used to depict Risk.

'The reality of danger is not at issue. The dangers are not only too horribly real, in both cases, modern and pre-modern. This argument is not about the reality of dangers, but about how they are politicized. This point cannot be emphasized too much '(1992:29)

I think people on the field could recognize this: it is not about how real is Jesus that the Japanese non-believers are concern about when making a decision to accept Christ. It is often not the reality of Jesus Christ, but about how He was presented and perceived in the social structure. And I see many workers struggle not to emphasize the point too much.

Other concerns that brought to bear in the ways of Salvation

I read this phrase in the book of RISK by Deborah. "The difference that is commonly observed between 'expert' and 'lay' judgments of risk is founded not in the fact that people cannot think in terms of probabilities, as some psychometric risk analysts have contended but rather that other concerns are brought to bear in the ways they judge risk. "

Would it be correct if I import the phrase to our term, "The difference that is commonly observed between Christian and non-Christians judgment of JUDGMENT (heaven and earth) is founded not in the fact that people cannot think in terms of probabilities, but rather that other concerns are brought to bear in the ways they judge heaven and earth."

You are welcome of feedback!

Rewrite the phrase again, it will be: "The difference that is commonly observed between Christian and non-Christians judgment of Salvation is founded not in the fact that people cannot think in terms of probabilities, but rather that other concerns are brought to bear in the ways they judge Salvation."

If this statement carries weight, then what are the other concerns are brought to bear in the ways? It might be useful in knowing them.


These concerns are essentially cultural rather than individual: 'individuals do not try to make independent choices, especially about big political issues. When faced with estimating probability and credibility, they come already primed with culturally learned assumptions and weightings' (Douglas1992:58)

Do not be anxious

Be not anxious, my heart says.

"Fight for a good fight. And trust that God is with you!" that's the voice.

Trust! Do whatever is necessary, and leave the result to Him. Do not be anxious if the rock had not moved, if He had asked you to push the rock. We could be sure what He had asked us to do, but we ain't sure about the whole plan. He might had asked me to push the rock to train my muscles for a tough fight. The door that He had opened, no one can close. The door that He had closed, no one can open.

Trust!

Sharing My Thoughts......

It is great to have God to install in Louis for the main points of prayers of Heart4Japan. Again, He reinforced to me that it is not me, but it is His vision to build up an army for Japan. If I get nothing out of this trip, and if I even didn't make it to the professional level that I hope to gain, having to see a life that is drawn out to
light up another would be as good!

I might not be the fire as great as I thought, but at least a candle. If I persist in the things that He called me to do, I shall be content when I give my best strength for it! That's the lesson I learned in last two weeks.

I constantly feel inferior to the subject of Principles in Public Health, because I suddenly realised there are many things that are happening around us and I was totally "unaware", or "ignored", and giving reasons that I'm pursuing "spiritual things" to be excused from it.

The question is: How could I be able to aim on the right target when I'm not even alert at the manifestation of evil deeds and disguised angels of light around me, in my neighborhood, in the nation that I'm praying for, what spiritual things that I'm talking about? To make it plain, I am such NAIVE.

And God is teaching me something today, and I finally found a good scenario to describe what I am to do. Have you read the story of Wizard of Oz? I feel like I am the scarecrow walking the journey to find my brain. People might perceive I have a brain, but I have really straws in my head.

For God had not called us out of the world, but in the world, and to make disciples, to be His light, to be His salt, to live His standard, so people will know that God is alive, and what a true God we serve, an unbeatable truth! It's scary to listen how we human had trade off our environment for our own greed, and isn't it as true as how we human had trade off our souls to the evil for temporal "goodness"? What significant to us the workers, many people trade off eternity for meaningless earthly treasures, and they knew it well. Isaiah 6:9; 48:8.

Do we think fighting tobacco or air pollution is worthless, when we have no control of the issues? Think about obesity and the chips and chocolates and sweets that we enjoy. No one knows the danger or the hidden messages behind all these. What do you think people think about us, these silly people telling people about God, about Jesus when people are tired of it, and why bother about idolatry, why bother
about principles when the king of the world is in control? Foolish, maybe. But I rather be a fool for God. And these fools are going to teach me how they fight in the task that God had put them there.

Foolish, to most people, for fighting tobacco, it's a personal choice.
Foolish, is to tell people stop eating chips, watch out of your weight, no ice-creams, no can food, we don't know what we are eating.
Foolish, is to talk about pollutions when the easiest resolution is to dispose the toxic waste to the nature. The nature can take it.
Are these harmless? Of course we are not aware for the effect was not immediate! How do we fight a good fight when we tell the people that we try to reach out to what they had been doing was wrong? And the true God is only Jesus? There is no immediate effect, no one knows it, shut up! Who do you think you are to tell me the truth?

Foolish, hur? God, help me to be a complete fool in you! So that I'll be able to do your wills without hesitation, without being influence of the smartness in this world.

We are fighting with Mammon. No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon (Mat6:24). Learning about the trade-off secrets, this verse appeared as a new light. The devil tried to tempt Jesus with wealth in the wilderness. We really need to watch our hearts.

The classes are giving me tools and hints in the same time in discovering more about Japan. With the limited strength and wisdom that I have now, I could only develop piece by piece. I know to some people, you would wish to see the whole picture. I'm sorry, I can't give it to you. I'm just not there. But what I will do is that I will
continue to write down piece by piece, even when people are tired about it. And perhaps one day, as I meet God, He will give me the whole picture, or He will give me brain that I would be able to look back at these journals and join the dots together. Be it Japan, or my future, I believe nothing will fall in vain. I am only a tool, I am to do what He calls me to do, and I'm not timeless. But He is Sovereign, He is TIMELESS.

Praise God for all His good deeds!

Hikikomori, tobacco, yakusa, yasukuni. Do these have a link? If there is a spirit behind this, it clearly dominates the "government"

HIkikomori, Ijime and Tokokyohi

When I studied about
hikikomori
, I learned that
ijime
and
tokokyohi
came before hikikomori. Hikikomori is defined as individuals who refuse to leave their parents' house, and isolate themselves away from society and famiy in a single room for a period exceeding six months. Ijime is defined as bullying in school. Tokokyohi is defined as school refusal.

What draw to my interest is the special relationship among these three phenomena. When you look closely, it is a cycle, consistently relating one another. You can read about these phenomena in Newspaper or articles. I would not make any elaboration of the symptoms and behaviors here. But there is something worth mentioning here, do you know this movie by Akira Kurosawa in 1993, Madadayo? This film tells the story of professor Uehida Hyakken-sama (1889-1971). There is a life-long attachment for the students to their professor. It contradicts with the survey today, where a tokokyohi student, said publicly that " we, tokokyohi people, are truly fed up with sucking up to the teachers" (Ishikawa et al. 1993:437). Are teachers to be blamed for tokokyohi, ijime or hikikomori?

There are more than the school factors, of course! I would recommend another movie here that give you a precise description about these people, "All About Lily Chou-chou" by Shunji Iwai.

Kobe Killer
The ghastly murder by a 14 year old "school killer" of 11 year old Hase Jun, whose severed head with mutilated eyelids and mouth was found at the schoolgate in Kobe in May 1997. He called him self "Sakakibara Seito", which means 'wine', 'devil', 'rose', 'sacred' and 'fight'. A part of his letter to the school goes:
          
               If I were what I had been when I was born, I would not have dared to leave a severed head at the front gate of a middle school.... But I have dared to draw public attention because I want you to see me as a real person in your imagination, although I have been, and wil remain, invisible. At the same time, I will never forget that it was the compulsory education system and the society that created that system that rendered me invisible, and I will exact revenge. (DY 29 June 1997)

Competing with the devil
If you look carefully what he had called himself, there is a spirit of evil behind that dominated him in doing such. Clearly, the system turned him into an "invisible" person, he traded his soul with the devil to exchange his existence. Guys, we are in competition with the devil today in Japan! They are grabbing the souls of the youths! Do we have enough man power to reach out to them?

In the movie of Shunji Iwai, we see people in search for paradise, New Age sneaked in just like that. If people are looking for eternal, and proof of existence, isn't Christ the best offer that we can give? Where have gone our courageous?

This is another BIG QUESTION that I would like to deal with!

Who is behind the education?

But come back to the education system now. I am writing this not to tell you that we are lack in the field, that is an old rhyme that I will keep playing anyway. But now, I want you to seriously think about this, what had made the value of school, education, teacher and student changed so much? From Madadayo to the Kobe incident? There were more as such that had happened!

The 1947 Fundamental Law of Education declared the principles of the new education of Japan, i.e. that education would no longer be used as the means to promote nationalism, and that it had to be recognised as a constitutionally guaranteed right of the people. "Educational administrators have to respect academic freedom and educational independence" (Horio 1988:256). According to Horio, there was a genuine enthusiasm among teachers who wanted to teach something to children in the poverty-stricken yet liberated social atmosphere of early postwarJapan.

But then, in 1956, things were changed. The 1948 Board of Education Law, which had guaranteed the local self-control of education and the citizen's basic educational rights was repealed by a law which provided for boards of education not elected but appointed by the governors. In 1957, the Teacher Evaluation System (kinmu hyotei) was introduced. Principals were charged with filing an annual personal report on each teacher in their school, including an assessment of "loyalty and love of education" and "how sincere, reliable, and cooperative a teacher had been". The most problematic feature of this system was " the fact that the teacher's rating remained a secret and was generally used to promote only teachers who supported the government 's educational goals". It also provided the means to punish union activists and thereby undermined the union (Horio 1994:234).

Japanese government - liberal Communist?
In the prayer meeting on October 23, Ken suddenly mentioned about the politics in Japan is typical liberal Communist. The government controls all, and only those who agreed with the voice could be promoted.


Then, I read about this when I was working on banning Tobacco issues. "In Japan, for example, the government has an interest in tobacco sales, and NRT is restricted to prescriptions for smokers who are already have smoking related disease" (Saul Shiffman, Joe Gitchell. BMJ Tobacco Control2000;9:228-236).

Blinding an eye, it just doesn't seem as a logical policy
The government seems to have something behind all these heating issues. Do you remember about the legal abortion that took more 30,000 lives a year? Which is more than the total of new borns a year.

The public and aggressive yakusa activities in Shinjuku, the kabuki-cho. The government seems just having an eye close to all these.

The visit to Yasukuni Shrine, did it begin with Junichiro? No, he did it publicly, that's how it created the issue. There is a certain spirit behind this. It gradually comes into picture by putting up piece by piece. Dr. Ozawa had called it spirit of Death.

The declining in population, and the rapid dying because of aging, the "involvement" of the government even in hikikomori, where it began from the education system. We are loosing lives!

Mixing external with indigenous elements

History suggested that simple acceptance of foreign models was an unlikely outcome, and that ultimately a creative solution might emerge, mixing external with indigenous elements(Stockwin J.A., Series Editor's Preface. The Japanese Highschool: Silence and resistance. Routledge. 1999).

Anyone who study about Japan find this a truth.

Citing examples: Pure Land Buddhism, Kakure Kirishitan, Kanji etc.

Japanese is just so creative in hunger of new materials, and without "forgoing" the traditional custom, they merge the different origin together and become real "Japanese", a new sect of teaching begin to emerge.

Has the Gospel being presented in its form? Has the Japanese accepted the Gospel in its pure form? I would like to gather a feedback from the scholars and workers on the field.

When Paul and the early disciples presented Gospel in Rome, in Greek, in Darmacus. Although Christians were being persecuted, but the Gospel was free and the message of "Freedom in Christ" was undoubted. People chose to believe in Christ, or follow Him by facing the risk of "alienated" and persecution, to trade-off a bigger FREEDOM in life. Therefore, Gospel is Good News!

But why in Japan, Gospel became a secret? In the highly conform society, is there any different from the Jews society where the Pharisees was greatly exalted and in charged. Of course there are a lot of differences!

My question is how Gospel is perceived today by the general public? Or by the fellow Christians themselves? As Louis boldly confessed himself as a Christian before his clients, they regard this religion is such a "bondage". Why?

Is it the law of our sinful nature that deny the freedom in Christ? Or a tactic of Satan that block people to Christ by putting scales in their eyes? Or we had again, adopted Christ Freedom, and mixing it with our own values and perceptions, turning it into a "bondage" which we were not aware of?

Note: This blog is welcome of discussions and feedbacks which the workers would like to share about their work in the field, and doubts and concerns that would trigger another thought and concern or perhaps solution. I'm a learner, and through learning, I have a lot of questions. I hope that by jotting down the parts and pieces of what I learn will help the next runner to gain. Shalom!

A Separate Newsletter... Hmm...

I have great weeks and months ahead!

God had kept me excite with visitors! After the visit of Mag and Esther, I have Ps. Sun Yong and Job to visit me, and now I'm hosting a Singapore girl who just came over for work before she could move to her new place. Indeed, I'm blessed and this house is made into a blessing to others.

Recently I have feedback that I was not writing about myself, it makes people hard to gage what to pray for me. True enough, I tend to blend my wish list with Heart4Japan's, with a desire that you will read about what I discovered about Japan, or what He has to say about Japan. Maybe I have just too much to write or too much to say and i wish to have people who read it ... he he :-)

Well, if this is thecase, maybe I would just keep my newsletter plain with my personal updates and prayer needs. How should we do it? Hmm... maybe ... I
should send 2 newsletter, 1 for the prayer group, another for Rose.

China Again Raise Anti-Japan Climate - Can Christian Makes A Different?

With referring to this news:
http://edition.cnn.com/2006/WORLD/
asiapcf/10/06/china.japan.ap/index.html

Every now and then, the Chinese Central government will try to raise Anti-Japan climate. First of all, it is a tool to keep the citizen busy, as well as to dilute the anger towards the government on several internal issues. Would the anti-Japan emotional crisis ever be resolved? Are we able to get our dear brothers and sisters in Christ in China to begin to see their "POVERTY" ? Indeed, they need Christ to intervene their lives?

And of course, introducing Christ to the Japanese, is giving them a chance to Heaven. Are we willing to bless the people who had once hurt us? Are we able to be a true disciple of Christ?

Well, they need to repent for the crime of the nation, I agree! But that would not give them credit for salvation. Salvation is by faith in Jesus Christ alone! We need to be very aware of that.

Besides, general Japanese suffer a lot during the war, after the war, and now. There are one Japanese who suicide every 15 minutes each day! People are disillusion, and they see no meanings in lives, this is nation that needs CHRIST! May we pray that the LORD will guard our hearts and lead us into prayers. Amen.

First United Methodist Church in Memphis was torned down in fire

CNN reported that on October 6, at Memphis, the First United Methodist Church, built in 1893, was largely destroyed by the flames, which were reported shortly before 3 a.m. Its roof caved in, the steeple toppled and some of the walls crumbled onto the streets.

Rev. Martha Wagley, pastor of the church, said members of her congregation gathered on the sidewalks as the structure burned, crying, recalling various worship services and telling stories of who was "married and buried" there. Wagley said her church is a "seven day a week" church with a food pantry and other ministries to people downtown.

I would never know why the church caught a fire? But I am sure God has a plan for the church, whether He intiated it or He had not initiated it. An idea of "seven day a week" church sounds GREAT! I pray that the congregation of the church, and the people down who had been ministered to, will come together in unity, to seek the Lord, and rebuild the church.

I believe that this would also be a time of furnace to the pastor and the leaders of the church, raising funds, cleaning, mentoring and sheperding would become so difficult. An internal cleansing would take place too. Why don't we just give one minute to pray for them? Pray that our good God will shield them with His grace and mercy. Pray for wisdom to deal with all the consequences and follow ups neccessity. May the unbelieved come to believe, through the good witness of this church!

I like this particular phhrase that Wagley said, "The building is lost, but not the church."

God is good, He is worthy to be praised! For it is often troubles that bring us closer to Christ. But, be in the obedience, and we shall taste His goodness double and triple fold. Amen.


http://edition.cnn.com/2006/US/10/06/memphis.fire.ap/index.html

More to Pray For!

1. Pray for the Good Work in Cambodia! Pray for the people to be ready, to be able to bring back HOPE, LOVE and LIFE back to their home, back to their neighborhoods. Pray that God will install plans for them, for His plans is prosperous!
2. Pray that the workers would have comfort by the fellowship in large with His children.
3. Pray that all hearts shall be blessed!
4. Pray that the officers will have good time in gaining experience whie working with His witnesses.
5. Pray for Sport Ministries that will come.

And here is my prayers for Makoto and Masayuki:

Lord, thank You for we know that You had been speaking to M&M. As we hear their testimony and words of praise, we know that although the devil try to break them, but You will hold us and let no one harm us! As Makoto had shared with us “Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.” Jeremiah33:3, we see a gentle spirit. As Masayuki shared with us " I entrust my lifeto Jesus. When my health completely recover I will come back to the Doulos again." we see the persistent will to serve! I thank You for being there for them.

Lord, we pray for Your mercy and kindness and righteousness to protect them from all harm. And Lord, I want to break the spirit of evil doers in hindering their ministry which You had called and caused them to do! You are the authority and power, all are under Your footstool, and now we proclaim our rights in You! When we are not healed by faith, let our soul be rest assure that You have bigger plan in this to defeat Satan! Just like Job, just like You, who died on the cross and rose again! You are Great an Almighty! We love Your name! And we praise You! And knowing that Your heart is wanting " all to come" !

狂與傲之間

我的個性是張狂的，我的表現能力是暴炸性的。這種個性的人藝術性很強，不按牌理出牌，可以很快很準地作決定，憑的是一股不安靜的動力。我這一生在他的掌管裡面，這種狂和變動性就很有意思了！這一種風浪裡翻騰的狀況經常出現在我的生命裡。縱然海上有多平靜，內裡儘是暗流洶湧。我只有一步一步地走著，警惕著自己莫忘了主基督，切莫因狂生傲。

在基督裡我可以盡狂，因為知道我所狂的不是自己，乃是主自己。但是傲乃是衰敗之首，所以願在這裡請大家時時為我代求，求他的恩典與怜憫緊隨著我，教我行在他的旨意裡，並凡事尊主為榮，決不竊了神的榮耀！願聖靈為我作見証，並指引我的一生！阿們。

We are blind to the needs of 2% of total human population a sorrow that leads from suicide linking to the unsaved nation

For every suicide it is claimed that on average six people suffer intense grief. The burden of suicide is immense. Those affected include parents, partners, children, siblings, friends, colleagues at work, and clinicians. Are we providing care to these populations?

The bereaved (The left behinds...)
Specific experiences that seem to be more common in people bereaved by suicide include stigmatisation, shame and guilt, and a sense of rejection. Feelings of guilt and blame may be linked to a quest to understand why the suicide occurred. Bereaved people may blame themselves for contributing to the death. Guilt and shame are, understandably, likely to be on the parents.

The lack of social support and increase of the isolation of the bereaved person, had brought attention to the public health practitioners. The sense of rejection associated with bereavement by suicide was increased vulnerability.

Blind
The symptoms are global, the impact of one suicide has not differed from one location to another. While the social health workers had noticed these problems, Church, are we still blind? Or make it easier, we prefer to dim it given the reason that this is too complex for us to handle?

The Needs
Each year, there are about 33 thousand people suicide in Japan alone. The bereaved would be 0.2 million a year. In past 10 years, we have more than 2 millions of Japanese suffered from mental illness and social deprivation just by suicide alone! Are we aware of the need for LOVE and HOPE in this population? Who can do more than the power of Christ?

Do we smell the Danger?
In the same time, the tension of aging rate and new-born rate is tearing the socialeconomic in Japan apart. Are we seeing the facts? Are we still standing there folding our hands, murmuring to ourselves that, "Ah, Japan is rich enough to take care of her own business!" The new prime minister in Japan had declared that he would not give in to the public pressure in visiting Yasukuni Shrine or giving honor to the death souls of the war criminals. Having the baby male hire in the royal palace had further dim the rights of women in Japan. Hikikomori, Ijime, children homicides and internet suicides are getting more prevalence, and began to spread its devilish influence to the neighboring countries. Do we see the risk? Or in a more simple word, do we smell the danger?

Time To Pray
Isn't this TIME TO PRAY? Church! He said, "the harvest is plenty, the workers are few!" He said, "Who will go for me?"

The largest APARTHEID
The time is near, Church! It is no more a personal vision about the land of Japan. If we are serious about the cry of "BACK TO JERUSALEM", if we are so serious about evangelizing China to carry out her duty to bring gospel back to the Middle East, if we are spending tons and tons of energies and money on the missions, aren't we aware that the huge lost here on this land? If Christ come tomorrow, the largest single monocultural, homogeneous people in the world, 127 millions of lives will be perish before our eyes! When we talk about nations, and REVIVAL in Asia, are we not ashame for this "neglection?" A single nation that make up 2% of the total population on earth. There is no excuse that we can deny the "Spiritual Poverty" and the urgent needs in this land!

Are we being called to pray?
If we believe that God had not called us to plow on this land, fine! But AT LEAST, can we pray for the good work that He already begun in this land? The people, the watcher that He had raised for His Kingdom? I believe that He is calling His children. I know God is stirring a fire in the nation on this matter. I found many devoted Christians had chose Japan as a place of vacation, and many love to be there for holidays. When I ask, I would hear them say, "Oh yes, it 's a country that full of idolatry, there are many social problems, but you know, unless God calls!"

Questions......
Do we live for ourselves or we live for Christ once we believed? On who's grace that we are able to have vacation? Was the desire to visit Japan a mere cry of our body and soul? A random proposal? Or is it purposeful? A spiritual reminder for those who love God? I leave this to you.


I am no judge to judge anyone, all of us have to stand before Him on that day. But there is a constant cry in my heart, telling me that the work had been hindered for lack of prayers. Therefore, I pray that you see and hear it too. And LORD, have mercy on me! For I am weak to pray too. I'm strengthless, help me my Lord. I need you.

Evangelize the world will not achieved when the largest 2% is left behind the door! May God have mercy on us!


References:
1. Clark SE, Goldney R. The impact of suicide on relatives and friends. In: Hawton K, Van Heeringen K, eds. The international handbook of suicide and attempted suicide. Chichester: Wiley, 2000: 467-84.
2 . Keith Hawton, Sue Simkin. Helping people bereaved by suicide. Their needs may require special attention. BMJ 2003;327:177-178 (26 July), doi:10.1136/bmj.327.7408.177
3. Joshua Project. (updated 29September2006)

Progress - October 06

Bible Study & Prayer Meeting
Thanks for your prayers! I am now leading a bible study and also a prayer meeting with Heart4Japan in Hong Kong every Monday afternoon. Please continue to pray for me for strength and wisdom, and being able to remain in His quietness and hear His voice. After all, praying is about searching Him deeply and getting closer to His heart.

Devil's interruption...
The devil had been trying hard to challenge God and interrupt His plans, but it wouldn't work. After 3 days staying in my windy apartment, I found a cigarette on my bed and left a burnt mark on my bed sheet. As I investigated, I found different and strange settings in each floor, and idolatry is really a bondage to many of the local residents. Then the next day, my kitchen started to " rain" as a result of improper plan of upstairs renovation. Yesterday there was no wind in my apartment and also some funny cooking smell. But no worries, God fix it all! The devil can't beat God. When God is with me, who can be against me? Amen. All things work for the good of the people who love Him! Jesus is great, hurray! God will continue to use this place to convey the message of Christ to the others!

God is Aware! He makes me glad...
God certainly knows about my needs! He always send right people at the right time! I met some deaf on Friday evening who knows how to communicate with American Sign Language after the unpleasant cigarette incident, and got my first pay to buy the necessaries in the kitchen. Then on Saturday, I was able to share Christ for 20 minutes and prayed with someone at home (though the kitchen began to rain after that). On Sunday, I was being led to this Cantonese Church of ICA, and there I was able to fellowship with the young adults and see the fireworks for more than 20 over minutes. Monday, I had a call from a friend which I missed so much, and it was really great because God must had made him to call me to encourage me to continue walking in His faithfulness! How Great Thou Art, He has great plans for me :-)

Assignment...
And I finished my assignment on time! each assignment would take me at least 3 full days of reading and thinking and organizing in order to complete a 800 words essay. I'm still figuring if I should do the 5000 words project or the 1500 words dissertation for the final term. I want to be effective in my tent-making business here as a student, a researcher, as well as the future missions possibilities.

Prayer Items:
1. Effectiveness in the ministry of Heart4Japan and the leading of bible study.

2. Effectiveness as a student.

3. Masa San, the 19 years old boy. Please pray for him. He was admitted to the hospital for asthma in Thailand last week. He had been a brave boy, he had not had any problems while he was in Japan, but somehow he was kept injured on the ship or at the dock in some strange ways. It could be largely due to spiritual attacks rather than his carelessness.

4. Makoto San. Please continue to pray for him as he had been caughing and having headaches in Cambodia.

5. Hoka-hoka Cafe's business has dropped based on the heavy competition. Pray that the Lord will keep His eyes on this business, as Louis had been boldly proclaiming Christ at this place, and using his restaurant as a point for meetings and fellowships. Blessed is the one who serves the Lord! Bless his business, enable Louis to be a sender or welcomer while he is waiting to go.

6. Continue to pray for Kazue and Rie for their re-adapting into Japan. Pray for strength and courage to proclaim Christ freely.

7. Pray for Heart4Japan in Malaysia and Vision Renewal in the church!



Oh, ya... HK is entering Autumn now, so it is windy and nice. But then, my started to have pimples on my face......:-(

A Deaf Friend Who Is In Hunger For God

My dear friends,

Introducing a friend...Winnie, deaf
I would like to highlight to you a person, a friend of mine, a deaf Christian lady. She had came to know the Lord 2 years ago, We have been sharing a lot and witnessing each other's growth. She always amazed me, I think God must have probably introduced her to my life to set a fire in my heart, and to encourage me to move on in times that I'm down and having fears. She is Winnie, the girl in the picture at the right of the top corner of this blog.

Hunger For Christ
She went to the Chinese church because she wanted to learn more about Christ. She does her bible study and she prays fervently. She has her quiet time with the Lord, asking him many questions and being settled with many comforts in Him. She had boldly came in to the "hearing" world, and communicate with people, join them in worship and services to the Lord. She always know about her disability, but she has a dream. A dream that leads people to the Lord with effective ways, a dream that being an example to the deaf that they can live normally in the "normal" world, a dream to be missionary, to tell people about Christ, Peace, Love and Hope!

Test Of Faith
Many times, she cries in the night, feeling that she needs to respond the Lord, fulfilling her duties as a Christian, being called by the Lord. She is just simple, and wants to grow and be deepened in the Lord! Recently she was struggling on a test of faith. She wants to go to Korea for a Christian deaf camp in October, she had not thought about it earlier, but she was encouraged by the Lord in early September. After many prayers, she knew that she had to go...

Here is her testimony...... ( her original work )


Dear my friends,


How are ya duin there? Its a good testimony indeed and I think you should read it. Then you will know how truly God is so good towards you so far...

I have been thinking about going to Korea recently, a quite long time... It's due to my facing financial problem. Sometimes,i become scared and started thinking nonsense. Hence, there were some of my friends send me some SMS messages asking whether I have confirmed on going to Korea with them or not and i have transfered money to her bank account for airplane ticket payment or not. On that moment, I feel stressful yet still confused. Since i am like that, then I started to pray for God as well as I need His help to guide me on leading my life to the right path.

At nite, I have chatted with Pastor Kim from South Korea on MSN. We were discussing about the trip to Korea. I felt sorry for them because they are facing with their trouble which I brought. After that, I need to take rest n try make a laidback on my brain. Next afternoon, I prayed to God again and this time, i asked Him whether I should go to Korea and tried to get some hints from Him as I was willing to obey His Will and Command giving my life to Him as well. Then i have made up my decision to draw money from my bank account. I was actually worried when i checked my bank account. My saving left so not much for me. It can be told that its my own fault because I was really spendthift. I feel that I myself am really useless. However, I still transfered my money into my friend's account bank.Finally i suddenly felt so peaceful and better even than before. Thanks to God, He gave me such a feeling. I was so touched. I praised Him so much in my heart.

Then, I went to my hometown visiting my family altogther with my sister's bf who fetched me from Kuala Lumpur. Upon my departure for Kuala Lumpur, there came up with people handling moneys to me and this person is my father indeed. I felt like my eyes almost filled with tears... God is faithful and He truly never broke His promise on me as He have said before. Then, there came again with people giving me money and its my sister. They are really care about me. Hallelujah Lord!!!
May God overflow His bless on you always!!!!

With Love,
Winnie Wei
peychyun2004@gmail.com


Why do I care about Winnie?
I was touched, many times by just looking at her. The way she worship, the way she responded to the altar calls, the way her tears roll in her eyes whenever she hears a message of crucifies, and knowing the Unreached. She had came to Heart4Japan to hear about the Lost Kingdom. She had always been giving sacrificially to others. And she gave to me too.

She makes a good impression to everyone who sees her and knows her. She tried to knock on every mission door: OM, OMF, Baptist Missions, "Is God going to open a door for me? Can I serve you, Lord? I'm a deaf, I'm disable, how could I serve you O LORD, teach me!" These are her cries.....

Cooking at my new apartment

Finally, my got my rice cooker, rice, oil, and I'm able to cook! :-) Long awaited moment, I enjoy cooking, especially when I'm far away from home. Cooking ease my pain while I am homesick.

Yeah, a good testimony! I tried to do krah-tong (deep fried veges), I never done it before, but I love the taste. (krah-tong - Its the dark green one in the middle of the dish. Aaron will remember it! It was one of the pleasant memories about eating while we were in Ranong last Nov) The oil was heated up fiercely with the presence of the washed vege. I ran to the door and peeped at the explosion of oil when the vege was dancing in the hot pot, it's like making pop corns. The oil splashed out on me as I had no choice but to approach it boldly to turn the gas off, but it really smell good... I just literally thank God for it, and you know what, I was not burnt nor hurt at all although it was terribly pain. Praise Jesus! He was wounded and I was healed. What a good God that we serve!

For Behold, The Day is Coming!

Malachi 4:1-3 "For behold, the day is coming, burning like a furnace; and all the arrogant and every evildoer will be chaff; and the day that is coming will set them ablaze," says the Lord of hosts, "so that it will leave them neither root nor branch." "But for you who fear My name the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings; and you will go forth and skip about like calves from the stall. And you will tread down the wicked, for they shall be ashes under the soles ofyour feet on the day which I am preparing," says the Lord of hosts.

一心一意，願尋求你的旨意。願我此刻知你是神。I want to know more, guide me Lord!

It's MY Vison, not yours!

At last, I had moved into my new apartment. I took a whole evening to try to set up things and make it right. Then, I had a sleepless night. Maybe too excited......

Going for the second meeting
This afternoon, is the second meeting for Heart4Japan in Hong Kong. I'm a bit nervous. Our first meeting was on Sep18, I left Malaysia on Aug 18, so it brought special meaning to me. :-)

Things that happened in the past month...
In the same time, Makoto is meeting a lot of Japanese Christians and missionaries in who are plowing His field in another hard ground, encouraging, but also fall sick often. Rie and Kazue returned home to continue their spiritual journey and practical battle for the Lord. Mayumi's father passed away in Kyushu.

God is moving, so are we. The vision became clearer, and the settings are getting into place. Witnessing the faithfulness of God is marvelous, in the same time frightful.

Getting The Church To Involve... What Does It Mean?
Recently God had been speaking to me on one thing: "It is time to get your church participate in My mission. The vision is mine, and the mission in not plainly for you. It is time to get the church involve." The prompting became much fierce during yesterday service. What does it mean, Lord?

It was a pleasant surprised this morning, as I found out myself had became a part of the contribution factors to the population of Hong Kong from year 2006-2008.

Imagine, then if I'm going to Japan after this, I would again contribute to the population count in that particular year.

无题

这里的海虽然在南边，看不见清晨的太阳，颜色的替换想也不比朝东的海畔那般多姿多彩，然而伴着四周小鸟的啁啾声，海面上三三两两盘旋而飞的海鹰，稀疏地来往岛屿的船只所划出的破浪，海面连岛连天的颜色还是在短短的一句钟里彩上了几层的颜色，亮了！明亮，原来是这样的简洁。

ABORTION in Japan

Abortion

The Maternity Protection Act (MPA) authorizes certified doctors to perform artificial abortion on women pregnant 21 weeks or less when the following conditions are met:
1) Pregnancy or delivery is likely to jeopardize the pregnant woman’s health in either physically or economically
2) The woman got pregnant because of rape
Whether the requesting woman meets the above conditions is up to the certified doctors’ judgment.

341,588 reported abortions in 2001 (Awakening: More than the known figure of 0.2% of church goers! )

The number of reported abortions in 2001 was 341,588, of which only 192 were because of rape. All others were performed for protection of maternal health either physically or economically. Majority of abortions are performed in early stage (11 weeks of gestation) of pregnancy, by which time no reporting of still births are required.

Were you stunned about the figures above? Then, look at this...
1.17 million abortions in 1955

The number of abortions has declined to a quarter since 1955, when the number hit 1.17 million.

Urgency of Teenage Ministry/ School Ministry

However the number of abortions of teenagers per age group 15-19 has steadily increased perhaps because of younger sexual activities and non-use of oral contraceptive pills (OCP has not been approved until quite recently). Currently approximately 11.9 per 1000 teenage girls undergo abortions annually (2003), more than doubled since 1995 when the figure was 6. MHLW aims to reduce unwanted pregnancies and abortions in teenagers by half for next 10 years.

The situation had alarmed the society. The public health figures begin to work on it. WHAT ABOUT US? The honorable field workers, are we doing anything? The sending base, are we doing anything? Can we do anything about this?

How about sending people that are specialized in this field, feed them on these information, train them to participate in one of those efforts that the government is trying to do. When religions measurement and moral ethics were raised, are we Christians able to be of influence?


Notes: In 2001, 13.6% of the mothers who went through abortions were below 20 and 45.5% of the mothers were from 20-29. 56.6% of the abortions were less than 7 weeks.

References: www.jpha.or.jp/jpha/english/ Japan Public Health Association, Tokyo

Efforts of Public Health v.s. Declination of Birth Rate in Japan

Success of Japan In Infant Mortality

Japan had done an excellent job in the maternal and child health. A sharp reduction of infant mortality was observed in 1975. Now, Japan is one of the lowest among the developed countries.

What had the Public Health policies that were implemented to achieve such significant result?

Public Health Practice

Excellent Maternal Care & Follow Up of Infants

It was claimed to be the success of MHC (Municipal Health Center). Pregnant mothers were given free health guidance and preventive medical activities as well as a health record for the child through the course of pregnancy and after birth. Health guidance and consultation by public health nurses may continue after birth especially when the new born babies are weighed 2500mg or less, in which case parents are required to report to the local public health centers to prompt them for quick action.

Mass Screening for Diseases

All newborn babies are entitled for public funded mass screening to detect congenital metabolic diseases such as phenylketonuria, and for the babies born to HB positive mothers, immunoglobulin and vaccination will be provided as part of health insurance benefit.

To detect preventable causes of intellectual impairments such as phenylketouria, cretinism, neuroblastoma etc. mass screening program for neonates has been conducted since 1977.

Insurance

For very low birth weight babies who require intensive care after birth, health insurance coverage starts on the first day of their births as dependent family status of their parent's health insurance. The usually required 20-30% co-payment will be waived by public funding for the babies whose birth weight below 2000g. All babies are entitled to free well-baby check ups twice at the age of 1.5 years and 3 years, all of which are provided by municipal governments.

Efforts of Public Health v.s. Declination of Birth Rate

Looking into these measurements that the government had taken, we could see the weight of attention in the newborns, or with the younger generations of tomorrow. But then, ironically inspite of all these excellent facilities, the birth rate in Japan is continue in decline. The alarming birth rate figure had left Japan into a futureless tomorrow within the next 50 years, accompany with huge aging unproductive problems. What is happening in Japan? If maternal and infant care is not the setback for having a baby, then what is the reason for not having babies?

Values

Risks and Perceptions

Could it be a medical issue? Could it be a moral issue? Or could it be a perception issue? Or could it be the finance burdens in raising up a child? Comparing the baby blooms immediate after WW2 and 1970s, it clearly depicts a change of value in the lives of the Japanese. Could we tell what is happening in the society?

My interest is about is there some kind of "risks" for the Japanese women to have babies? And if yes, what are their concerns?

Another interesting finding is, although there were massive screenings for congenital metabolic diseases for the babies, but in a somewhat odd contrast, intrauterine diagnoses of Down syndrome and other detectable anomalies are not actively performed. Why? Is this a cost problem? Or is this something to deal with the perceptions?

May God help us in understanding.

References: 1. Public Health Japan, 2005

感恩 + 信靠

温暖的教会，有爱心的弟兄姐妹：因为你们的祷告，事工终于有进展了！感谢神！

每一次收到教会的问候信件，心里就觉得很温暖，谢谢。

真得很谢谢你们的祷告！很需要哦！我刚报名念中级日文的文凭课，星期一到星期四中午的时段都要上课。我平时上课的时间都是在星期二和星期五的傍晚，以及星期六的上午。为日本祷告的事工证实在下星期开幕，好耶！每个星期一的下午三点到五点，在一家日本餐厅。很不错吧？接下来要做的事情还有很多，比如确定每个星期要上的教会啦，要参与的特定小组啦等等。

来到香港吓了一跳，大学方面不愿意发宿舍给外国的硕士生，也不让我们申请奖学金。还有，你持的文凭、资格什么的要申请大学的工作比如研究员啊，他们看也不看，原因是因为我的身份是外国学生。挺讨厌的！所以PART-TIME工作时不用想了！但转念想也好！套句话说，我来到香港已经不容易了，要不是上帝开路，这是不可能的。学生事务处告诉我，我的签证是最快了，还把他们吓了一跳！因为香港移民厅不准外国学生念PART-TIME。要是批的话，也是只让你一个星期逗留香港三天，而且通常这样的手续要办上至少八个星期以上。所以在经历奇迹的时候，要感恩。他大概就是断了我这种打工上课的思想，要我全心相信他的供应吧！

我们教会有没有提供奖学金给穷学生？人啊，虽然说靠信心，还是很软弱哦！

信靠主，信靠主，阿们！

Different States Of Mind

Being a Light

I began to see a shift in my mind state, as I prayed about "being a light". The prayer went like this:
(i) Jesus, send me as light. So that people will see, and know that you are God!
(ii) Jesus, send me as light. So that people can come, the devil can hold them no more in darkness or cold!
(iii) Jesus, send me as light. So that I can give people a warm embrace!

When I seriously thought about it, I saw a clear difference in the mind states of these prayers that had been made. Although I had asked for the same thing: Send me as light!

In the states of mind:
First prayer: Your power is great! Reveal through me! Let people see, let themknow, let them not judge me wrongly!
Second prayer: Break the bondage, O God! The devil cannot clutch them in its hand! Free your people!
Third prayer: I'm going in, bringing your light. I'm going to touch them, and hug them with your love!

There were nothing wrong about the three mind states. But there would be a clear difference in what the setting probably would be. The setting of the first two prayers was a setting on stage, perhaps an Evangelical Crusade. The setting of the third somehow was very personal and home base.

???

Maybe you would ask, "What's wrong with her? Why do we need to differentiate these when the outcome is the same? We want to be the light, that's all!"

No, the answer is the outcome will not be the same. "Being the light" is not the outcome that I'm looking at. Maybe to us, yes. But to God, I think to send us being a light, there is a further outcome that he wants to see. That is the impact on the people in his Kingdom and outside his Kingdom door. What interest him is the power of his words that had been released. What we will do or achive will definitely be from our hearts. And our states of mind will be at parellel.

Changing from state to state

While I was praying the first prayer, and I was not on the stage. I was actually saying this, "God, I'm weak, I'm no man of respect of your people. How could I speak? Shine through me! So that people will not see me acting as my own, but I'm acting according to your purpose. O God, let me not be ashamed!" At that state of mind, I would not bravely go out and tell people about God, about eternity, but I would be waiting for a confirmation, an embrace from God, to comfort my soul and my vulnerable state of mind! What I wanted was a confirmation, something like Jeremiah 1:7.

But as I prayed the third prayer, I was ensured, and embraced by God's love. The confidence was there, the hope was there, and therefor I could be the light bearer, to go into disaster states of mind, to begin to recognize, to reconcile, to love and care and tender the wounds in our souls.

Manipulation

The power of mind is great! Our interpretation of message is clearly at the state of our mind. For example, when you are hungry, and you walk down the stairs of your apartment, you begin to smell the fragrance of the roast duck, the sweat, the heat of people going in and coming out from the restraunt, you will be clear that the time is seven o' clock in the evening, and you had not eaten anything from the morning. But when you are full, walking down the stairs of your apartment, you might just see the street, focusing on your task, or you might look at people, seeing the food hanging at the stores, but you would have no desire of tasting it. Walking down the stairs were the same action. But a different physical state has a different manipulation of mind, and that will determine what we would probably do next in a normal circumstance.

May this article bless you as much as it does to me. Amen.

What is taking place in the psychology state in the mind of Japanese to accept Christ?

Perceptions and values in relation to the gospel work in Japan

Risk: decisions and responsibility
When Giddens introduced Risk, he said tradition and habit replaced by diverse claims to (provisional) expertise requiring individual judgments. And when it involves individual judgment, it involves a responsibility that comes with the choice.

In Japan, along its’ way long of history of anti-Christian attitude, even if one would start to see light in the teaching of Christ, it involves a decision to make and a responsibility to follow if they choose to be saved. In Japan, it takes a membership to be registered whether in the shrine, the temple or the church. There is no secret hiding place. Everything is transparent. Therefore, when Japanese decided to accept Jesus into their lives, they are taking a risk. To the society, and its root is deep within every culture, every nation: a loss of social harmony is a moral danger, a threat to our value.

Social harmony: traditional values and challenges (3 settings: the society of Japan, caste system and Pharisees, Christian’s denominations)
As the missionaries in Japan began to query the standard of believes, the set of values of the Japanese in terms of right and wrong, they were often confused with their many gray areas. Right and wrong depends on its specific time, space and condition. There are many grey areas, where the foreigners find it hard to accommodate. Christianity is absolute. There is only one way to God, one way to Heaven. And that is through Jesus Christ. No grey area in this. However, in the traditional practice of Japan, people were brought up with a set of value that was very much considered to the feelings of others. They are very polite people that anything which is to break the social harmony is a crime. So the set of value of Japanese in right and wrong would be antagonizing one’s feeling. Humiliation would cause the Japanese to give up their lives and that is an honorable way of death. This is the truth of a value of society.

Let’s translate the same pattern of thought to the struggles in dealing with caste system in India, or even back to the Old Testaments as how the Pharisees had rebuked Christ, we are dealing with the same thing, which is the value of a society that feel hard to accept challenges to the traditional believes. Social harmony prefers stability. When a new set of values is introduced to the society, and the society is not yet ready to take in the new set of values, it creates instability. People begin to debate, to experiment. This is harmful to a society which is highly social bond. A nail that is stood up must be hammered down. Trying out a new concept that is against everybody’s value is a threat to the social harmony.

Let not try so hard to fit in to the pattern of thinking of this passage. There are many different denominations in Christian practice today. There are Baptists, Methodists, Brethrens Churches, Independent Churches, and Assemblies of God etc. Some moves heavily in prophetic era, some put heavy concentration in words, some put more concentration in experiencing God, and so much more different practice, different emphasize. All these had not loose one focus that is Christ our Savior, the only Son, the only way to Heaven, the one that died and rose for us that took away all our sins, the living God! And that is how we would still basically hold together as brothers and sisters in Christ. But we are not talking about the value of God that we hold dearly today. We talk about practices. Can we speak in tongues in the midst of those who hold doubts to this spiritual gift? Can we sit down and be solemn as others are rejoicing in the presence of Christ. Think carefully before we answer this question. I am talking about exercising this in every service while you are the only charismatic in the midst of the conservatives, or being the only conservative in the midst of the charismatic people.

The value of doing different thing in a society might not be wrong, but it breaks the harmony. It is hard to blend in while you hold a different set of value in a society. It is the same set of value that creates the bond.

Ku Klux Khan is a good example in trying to reject another value system, where it was not even alien to them.

Calculation: risk vs. probabilities – it’s harmful but it might not happen to me!
Let’s take it back again to the gospel work in Japan. Do we expect people to step out of line with their peers and workmates by introducing Jesus to them? If that is so, then we must consider is there a need to change? Are the benefits of change implying to the society or individual? When we talk about psychology in medicine, for a man with a high coronary risk score maybe 20 or even 30 more times as likely to suffer a heart attack as a man with a very low score, to consider the need to make radical changes in his lifestyle, then he needs to know is some absolute measure of his chances, and by how much he could hope to improve them in the foreseeable future

What I am trying to emphasize here is our perception and attribution might not be in parallel. It is our experience, context, belief systems that driven us to make judgments and decisions. Our values and needs stimuli the judgments that we make. For example, a smoker might think, “Would the benefits of health greater than the social stigma of the circle of peers that I live with when I quit smoking?” These are on-going processes in the psychology state of a person who is about to make serious adjustment in his lifestyle.

Is the risk being a Christian more than being a non-Christian in reality? Is the future of the Kingdom unforeseen or it is right in front of us? Our interpretation makes a different! And that comes back to us to the roots in our belief. Are we strong in the knowledge of Christ, do we have that confidence in what we preach? When Apostle Paul spoke to Athens in Acts chapter 17, what had happened?

Change: individuals vs. populations
Friends, I’m writing this so that you will not be discouraged when facing the opposition from the field, and with the long dragging decision to choose to believe in Christ.

It makes little sense to expect individuals to behave differently from their peers. But we have hope in Jesus Christ! We can pray and work towards to seek a general change in behavioral norms and in the circumstances which facilitate their adoption.


Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God, for I will praise him, my Savior and my God.
~ Psalm 42: 5



Reference:
NIV. 1987.
Beck. 1991.
Giddens. 1991.
Rose G. 1992.
Lecture notes. Perceptions & Biases. R. Fielding. 1996

将圣经和硕士课程并排

来到香港已经三个星期了，感觉上却像来了一个月。言语上的适应还算好，文化上基本上也无甚差异，但是想家的感觉是特浓。

新的学年 + 动机

上完了暑假课程，现在开始进入新学年的课程了。阅读的材料很多，时间可以很从容，也可以很繁忙，就在于自己想从这门学问里得益多少。这期间，我不断地问自己，我到底来香港干什么，是为人，是为己，还是为主？在任何一个层面里，三个因素是不多不少都存在的。感谢主，在静静观察的这段时间里，我益发相信上帝带我来这里上公共卫生学（PublicHealth)是有前因后果的。

敏锐和批判

我发现我脑袋里的一些理论和近年来的一些预备，和社会研究脱离不了关系。公共卫生学的硕士课程需要学习的东西很多，而且都是从生活上去学习。换言之，我需要有很敏锐的触觉，很前卫的理想，很批判性的审决力。我想，建立教会和开荒，是非常需要这一点的。正因为这一点，我不再质疑我自己的动机，因为要在这门课上和教会和圣经学里扯上关系是我不曾想过的。

禾场

我有个构思，就是将圣经和这里所学的任何一课，并排着一起念。这样会花上很多时间，可能别人会觉得无需这样做。但是我想这个训练对我来说是有益的。我希望自己将来传福音的时候，能够很清晰地分析这个社会的各个状态理念，并且不将神搁之于外。很多科学家，哲学家，在谈论他们的论学的时候，神成了一个副论，将信仰放在教会里面，我觉得这样的人格很两极化。在处理事情上是简单很多，但是对于我来说，是弊不是利。

要是我将学术界当作我的禾场，学术当成我的途径，那我的剑就需要磨得锋利。请就这一点为我祷告，希望我这样做的时候，在同学和老师面前不会引发太大的争议。我要是能公开这样而行，对我来说是有好处的，那我可以省下更多的时间，还可以发挥光和盐的作用，而且将来的走向也不至引来太大的争议。

请为我祷告，我觉得我这个想法，就算在信徒之间也未必能够被接受的，好像有点骇人听闻似的。在缺乏信心的情况下，要一方扩展神的国度的理念，会很难。Heart4Japan 也会因为我现在的走向令人难以接受吧。

一节火车

但我想，这总是神的事工，神的心意啊！我不过是一节火车，行在这个轨道上。我沿着轨道走，纵然没有人登上这节火车厢，下一节火车厢还是有人会登上去的。我的这节车厢，能不能上人，还是充当一个警觉、信号，是神的意思啊。我能够做的，只是沿着轨道走下去。车长是主耶稣，不是吗？算了，我既不想寂寞，也不想弄脏车厢，又不想不按时跑，哈哈哈。我到底想干什么呢？我想还是顺从耶稣的意思，好过自己的意思吧。

轨道是好的，车长也是好的，那车厢不愿行，那不是抛锚了？那车长要愿意休息，车厢到要继续跑，那不是听容易出轨吗？就像现在这个时候，我找房子的这段时间，我自己尽管着急，但是心里觉得车长正休息着，我是盲忙。当我理解这一点的时候，我开始允许自己放缓脚步，融入他的安息，感觉还真像充电一样！

感谢神，他的恩典是满满的！

笑一笑和上帝的恩典

笑一笑：

正当我照着镜子，叹着岁月不留人的时候，昨天有个阿伯充当天使安慰了我。话说昨天，我因为天上下着滂沱大雨，于是和同学一同乘车到了中环的一家购物商场吃中饭。在玻璃门外边的行人天桥上，有一个阿伯，手上提着许多外卖，还提着雨伞，看起来重的样子。于是我冲上前去给他开门，小事一椿，但他感激得很，就边走边和我说话。他一直称我"阿妹"，我就顺口应他。他说，"阿妹啊，你真好人。还在念书吗？"我答，"啊，是在念书。"他就说，"好啊，你在那儿念书啊？"我就答他，"我在港大啊！"他听了，停了一下，就正经地向我解说，"港大啊，不错。但是是第三好的大学啊，最好的是"波记"大学啊！"我一听，兴趣可来了，还有"波记"大学啊！于是就瞪大眼睛问他，"波记"大学在哪儿啊?然后他转头问我另一个问题，你在大学几年班啊？我很想回他说，一年班。但是想想，还是不好骗人吧，就答他，"我在念硕士班。"他就唔的一声。后来啊，我们就转头走不同的路了，没几步，他转了回来，大声地问我，"阿妹，你有二十岁了没？" 我噗嗵笑了出来，忙点头。哎呀，我原来样子还不太老啊。感谢神。

耶稣的恩典够我用：

今天我上了北角的国际基督教神召会，我终于可以开始融入敬拜了，能够再一次听见神在聚会里跟自己很亲切地说话的那种感觉实在太好了！我足足有两个星期在教会里总是有点像旁观者的感觉，格格不入的。今天，我终于又听见上帝跟我说话了。在赞美敬拜里，在经文分享里，实在太棒了！更感恩的事，上帝在我的苦闷里拉了我一把。

软弱

其实我很软弱，我这几天都在想，我为什么来这里？我为什么离开爱我的家，支持我的教会，来到一个陌生的地方？为什么放弃一大片的薪水，现在要像孩子一样的重新开始？我原来是克制着自己不去这样想的。于是我说，上帝啊，我是因为你而来的。但是，我来的目的是什么了？是因为我想得到上帝的赞许和允准吗？我似乎很担心别人怎么看我，我总担心我做错了什么。然后，我盯着上帝说，主啊，我信靠你！其实我的肚子里，咕噜咕噜第一大堆难受。思乡啊，想家啊，念着教会阿，满肚子委屈！我今天敬拜的时候，赫然发现，主在十字架上为我所留的血正是我的依靠啊！

小信

我的信心多小啊，正当我以为自己已经跨越极大的信心，辞工，来香港念书，抱着Heart4Japan的理想的时候，我其实没什么。信心的门是一道又一道，我的眼睛在每横过一扇门的时候，就注目在另一个定点了。我开始注意到自己的周遭环境，开始去衡量得失，我为自己焦急，为Heart4Japan的拓展和是不是该找工作，是不是该学习日文等等的，我的心总是不能安静下来。我还想怎样让别人支持我，为我祷告，在经济上支援我，我突然发现自己在香港变得好土，好不潇洒，我想回家！

异像

我给自己一个很美的解释，我来香港是为了神的国度！我是背负着任务而来的，我向自己说。但是今天，神提醒了我一件事。我看见了自己在十字架前，主在十字架上，我好像置身在一幅油画里面，他在十字架上垂下来的手握住我的手，我另一只手无力得撑住地面，我原来块沉下去了，但是他紧紧的温柔的牢牢的将我捉紧，将我扶起来。我终于记得了，我当初的热诚和爱。

唤醒的记忆

我回应是为了主的爱，是因为感受到他真实完全没有保留的爱。我回应只是因为听见主在说："谁为我去呢？"没有条件，正如他爱我，为我牺牲的时候，没有设任何条件一样。这是我在这里真正的原因，我到日本去真正的原因，我愿意背负Heart4Japan的原因！是没错为了国度，但是更真切的是因为他的爱。 然而当我碰见了困难，一步一步地走将下去，我的目光逐渐变成狭窄，我只看见了国度。在他的深情厚爱里，我忽视了他对我的爱！


这真是很好的一个提醒，很响的一个巴掌。我祷告的时候很清楚自己并没有走在圣灵的旨意之外，无论是来香港，还是念Masters of Public Health，我都很清楚他在带领着我。甚至是现在的住处，我的临时工作，我的coursemates。盗贼想偷去我的平安和喜乐，偷不了，但是我却差点不经意地任由他将我的爱情偷去了。我羞愧得很，也高兴得很，因为主让我寻回了我的爱情。

咬牙的坚持

所以今天下午，我纵然感受到和日本人之间的那个距离，但是主支撑着我，我知道我来这里不是为了这个日本教会，而且我们都是同时热切地爱着神的。他们既是感觉不到位日本祷告的事工的逼切性，即使是遄测猜疑我的目的，那也没关系。对他们来说，我不过是一过客，那循着常理，也是自然不过的事。我相信，主要是决意让我们合作，他会自己跟他们说话的。至于我，他给我的任务是去众教会点起一把为日本祷告的火把，那我就安心去做吧！事要如何的行，我不懂。但是我想，既然他是车长，我是一节火车，那我总会碰上另一节火车，一节一节的连接起来。

为日本祷告不是很清楚是他的旨意吗？主既然能够将一个从来也没有祷告恩赐和代祷念头的人唤出来代祷，那这个事工肯定不是一个人能够做出来的事工，索性把我放去日本就好了。既然他做了那么多预备的功夫，那我就应该安然的静心等待。时间长短在他的掌控里定然有一个最好的安排。我要信！信是所望之事的实底，未见之事的确据。

见证再一次的绝志

这是我的告白，请你们在这里为我的再一次决志作一个见证，也请大家为我代祷。求主赦免我的不义，感谢主耶稣，我愿意相信你爱我，你对我的爱不亚于对日本的爱。求主原谅我的不成熟，并且谢谢主一切的供应。求主赐给我平安，自在，喜乐的心。叫我安静在你的里面，知道你是神。你是我的神，也是外帮人的神。这个身份不会因我们世人的选择而改变。在造我以前，你已经知道我，你已经细心的将我记在你的生名册上，你是阿拉法，也是哦么嘎。你叫我在你的爱里坚强。谢谢你，耶稣。我爱你，愿将自己再一次献上给你，请你帮助我守着这一个一生的约定。阿门。

爱心的醒觉

启示录2：4然而又一件事我要责备你，就是你把起初的爱心离弃了。


我们可以口里说爱神，我们可以有很多很好的行为，但是心里最底处，我们有个不为人知的底线。很多时候，连自己也不知道。但是知道了，也并不足以叫我们自我批判，因为我们不审判自己，也不审判别人，只有神当作公义的审判者。真理在于神，也只有神才是完全的真理。我们可以错，但神不会错。当我们对神有足够的信心的时候，方能够踏出信心的脚步。当上帝应许亚伯拉罕后裔的时候，足足等了25年。其间，亚伯拉罕有不少信心的踏步，也有不少怯步和错误，但是神不离弃我们。他的祝福不会食言。求神帮助我们。




注："波记"大学原来是科技大学。我可能太累，听错了。哈哈。"波记"大学，像茶餐厅的名字。

上帝的超恩典！愿你平安 ：-）

真是超幸福感！我的房间面对着大海，现在处于早晨六点，在一片清澈的蔚紫色里给你写信。微紫色该是深蓝色渗入了红霞吧，哇塞！蔚紫色的一片天很快就要成鱼肚白了。我住的这里叫做海怡半岛，在香港的南部，对面是南丫岛，听说是很贵的一个单位。

我是怎么住进来的？若非上帝的恩典，应该不成吧。我现在的实际情况上暂时住上的。有个教会的姐妹看见我开始的时候每天从粉岭去大学，觉得特辛苦，就邀请我过来，让了孩子的房给我睡。超好人的吧！虽说来自同一间教会，我还是来到这里才认识人的。这几天再逼切找房子的时候（觉得住太久不好，了别打扰了别人的常规生活），却觉得上帝在休息，似乎在嘱咐我别忙，安静，知道他是神。

我希望能找一间房子住的学校近一点，可以省下巴士的费用，和午餐钱。要是我能够找到一件大概二千左右的房间，省吃俭用一点，我想大约马币2千五会足够我一个月的开销的。我借了一些翻译的工作来作，可惜这种工作不是时常有，但是感谢神，才来这里不久，就能够找到一份翻译的工作已经不错了！加上这个月住在朋友的家人，吃喝住的方面省下了不少。在香港这个地方，头几个月的开销可能会重一点，但是安顿下来后，以后的生活就应该可以好办很多。感谢主，就享受他的带领吧！

我目前定时上北角的一间日本教会，今天打算去上它的儿童主日学，我像这样可以学习日文吧！要真正融入他们的圈子里不容易，需要很多的时间和耐心。我目前还在寻求上帝的意思，这一间日本教会可能只是一个联络点，而非我禾场的重心。我自己也想找一间能够培养我的教会，一个牧者去见证我在这段时间的成长。然而，好像还不是时候。就好像找房子的事情一样，他似乎都在叫我静心等待。

天色已经全亮了！开始看见船只陆续不断地进出港口。船上所装载的是人，是货，还是希望？出航的航标是理想，还是生活？

愿你愉快。你的前面是理想，是生活，还是希望？但愿耶稣是我们的舵！

我还是需要一些时间去适应这里的生活环境，和种种生活常规的操作方式。神祝福。

Home Sick

My Mom...Please continue to uphold my family in your prayers. Especially for my mom, I could feel some distress somehow in the tone of the emailing. But honestly she had been extremely encouraging!!! Bravo! I'm really proud of her.

Home Sick...
And here am I, feeling terribly homesick, just after 19 days. What a terrible missionary I would make.

Getting Clearer...
I'm getting clearer now about the choices that had been made, for the course and the location. I began to be more convinced that He had brought me here, to the study of Masters in Public Health. It's exciting to see how things fall into place. I'll let you know further in the next letter.

Accomodation...
Meanwhile, I need to find an accommodation which is cheap and good. A place that enables me to have easily assess to church, to school, to H4J cell group with minimum cost. Please pray for me that I would not rush into decision but He will leads me in all the decisions I make at this moment. Finding a place to stay seems to be the most crucial subject to me at this moment.

Keep Faith...
Keep me in your prayers! Our Father had been faithfully providing for my needs. Please pray that I will not be shaken, walking in Faith takes a lot more than I thought... God is GOOD!


Strive...
I heard that Yean and Pauline are still praying for Japan! That's excellent! Thanks!

One Week In Hong Kong

Adjusting...
It have been a week since I landed in Hong Kong. Still adjusting... to get familiar with the roads, bus route to school, back home, to the city center etc. Many silly mistakes made... haha! Yesterday, I moved officially from Fan Leng to Elaine's place in Hong Kong Island. I took a taxi from Hong Ham Railway Station with the help of Cannas. It cost me about HKD98, about 20 minutes at peak hour. Thanks for the rain, if it was not the rain, I had probably took the KCR train, and then the MTR, and then a bus to South Horizon. That will cost me around HKD 25, and it will take me at least two hours to reach home. So, I concluded it as a good deal! :-) I'm planning to move to Chi Fu next week, so it would be even nearer to the school, a shorter distance. I had been really blessed by Elaine and Ken. They are really angels that God sent perfectly on time to reduce the stress of travelling average four hours a day back and forth.

New Friends...
A group of us (the new students in the MPH) get really close to each other. We went to the main camp together this morning to process the student ID. Victoria and me will visit Sky's church tomorrow, Vine in Center. Then, in the afternoon I will go to Church On The Rock, the Japanese church in Tai Koo. Oh, ya... I am going to the Japanese Cafe this afternoon at about 2pm. I'm writing to you in this cafe named MIX. They have a Internet service for their customers. Limited to 20 minutes per user, however... you know... haha.

Japanese bible study...
I went to Kakuko's bible study group @ home fellowship? on Tuesday evening. Plain Japanese, except Cannas and me. I really hoped that they can start to pray for Japan as they are Japanese, however, the practice of praying might need to experience a revival before that. LOL. Cannas was thinking to start a Heart4Japan prayer group in Kowloon. That's a great idea, please do pray for that! And I might get a few person in the island to start praying for Japan too. Let's see how it goes......

Is this really a way to Japan?
I'll be meeting Janice Johnston on Monday afternoon to discuss again about the modules and the dissertation, hope to find out more to see if I'm on the right track. Please pray about this too. That will decide how I'm going to spend time in this 2 years, and how could I possibly go to Japan after this.

Accomodation, is this the right place for me?
Please do pray for a good time of fellowship with Theressa Lam too. The landlady that I'm going to stay with, she had a lot of "restriction" in the beginning, eg. no cooking, no staying at home in the day time, blar blar...... But now she is considering to give me special permission in cooking, and having small group discussion or bible study at home. However, we just need to pray for this. The denomination different really matters to her church leaders, but thank God, not her. So, if I'm really going to stay with her, there are a lot of things that I'll gonna watch out, and pray for. A nice lady, she bought me a burger when we last met. :-)

Attention...
Japan, Japan, Japan...... What is the reason that I come here for? Is it for Japan? or is it for God? I really need to be very focus on Jesus, even in the whole area of missions. Of course I have no doubt that He had lead me here with a great deal of reasons that of Japan, but would He had more thoughts for me? I can only be open to that as I direct my full attention to HIM.

Retreat ...
Staying in Elaine's place is like a retreat, the block is facing the sea, and it's often very windy. My meals and laundry have also been taken care of. Really appreciate that... thanks, Elaine! God is great, He provides. And when we call on Him, He answers. More than what we asked for.

Support...
I heard from my mom that the ladies had encouraged her very much by sharing prayers and thoughtful ideas with her... THANK YOU SO MUCH...... It's not really a great idea to leave home, but because of the love, care and concern of you people, it helped to strengthen us A LOT...... really. God Bless!

Finally Arrived

Finally arrived...
Finally, arrived in Hong Kong, started as a student, going into classes. Everything is new for me here.

Warm Weather...
The weather here is still summer! Oh... no... I thought it would end by September, and now I took almost all thick clothes, lol. I'm afraid of cold, you know... well, the autumn would only begins in the end of October. But the library and classrooms are very cold because of the air-cond. The clothes that I bring is still suitable if I'm going to stay in the school for the whole day :-) Walking out the street at night is still humid and warm.

2 hours of traveling X 2 ...
I stay in Fan Leng, which it takes about 1and a half hour to 2 hours of public transport to the university. However, GOD is forever faithful. I had started to make friends with my classmates, interesting though. And I'm as usual, forever blur in everything... haha. But I do meet wonderful people, bless you!

Malaysian Classmates...
There are 2 Malaysian government officers here just to take the summer course. It is great to meet someone from home! I'm still looking around for an accommodation near school. The one in Fan Leng is alright, accept for the long hours of traveling. And it is expensive, just travel in between the school and home will easily cost me about HKD1500/mth.

Out Of The Box
The class is interesting. It seems that I would need to learn how to transform the normal days practice and logical thinking or action into conceptual ideas in drawing out theoretical and practical enforcement. Feel like studying philosophy now. A lot of creative thinking were involved. By listening to the conversations between the lecturer and the other students, it is like you really need to jump out of the box, and it's a bunji jump! If you think I'm crazy enough, I think I'm rather a kinder garden kid in this situation. lol. I will really need a lot of prayers form you people! :-D

Assignments!!!
My first assignment is deal on September 2, and I am now in the library trying to look at the data and do some research. The assignment only require 2 pages, but the citation might take 1 page(exclude the 2 pages). A lot of readings! And I will be amazed if I could fix all that I want to present in 2 pages. Whew...what a challenge! I need that though :-) I often write too long...

I'm trying to focus on the topic of "Measurements and Prevention of Suicide in Japan." However, the focus area still need to be refine.

I have 4 clinical papers to read, 2 chapters in the text book to read, and a bundle of notes to work on, today. Urrh.... got to go! Will need to see the possible place where I will be staying later.